HOME

BOOKMARK

NEWSLETTER

Join our newsletter to receive news of offers and discounts

Search

AS FEATURED IN...


Lucy Siegle On Eithical Living: Sunday March 5, 2006 The Observer

Weight Watchersź.co.uk. Now with an online plan.

Navigation


Parening Books

Search Now:
Amazon Logo


Does Sexual Abuse Usually Occur Just Once?


Your daughter tells you that Uncle Charley has touched her bottom and she doesn't like to sit on his lap anymore! Should you believe your child? Yes.

Your initial reaction is to confront Uncle Charley, who tells you that your child is making it up and even if it did happen, he will never do it again.

He promises he will never ever touch another child inappropriately and you want to believe him. Should you believe him? Probably not.

Perhaps abuse will occur just once with a certain child, but most pedophiles will just cast their eye for a more amiable victim. It is usually not the first time the molester has done this. Nor will it be the last time, even if the child convinces the molester to leave him or her alone. Offenders who have been caught tell researchers that nobody does it just once.

This is a compulsive act which stems from compulsive thought patterns. Pedophiles have repetitive sexual fantasies involving children usually in one age group or gender. Some may be able to contain those fantasies and thought patterns and not act upon them. and they do not become offenders. The perpetrator feels compelled to abuse on a regular basis, especially when things are not going well in their life, or they are under stress. Most offenders abuse more than one hundred times before they are caught. Many will re-offend after serving their time in custody.

Sex abusers will continue the same sick patterns until they are physically stopped or the fear of intervention on the part of the molester becomes very evident. They may be abusing or grooming more than one child at the same time. For instance, if a teacher is caught and arrested for molesting a student in his/her classroom, the chances are high that they have tried to molest others in the class and other classes they have taught.

It is the same for those who commit incest: very rarely is it just one victim. The molestations sometimes continue for months or years starting first with a good touch such as backrubs or tickling. But then it escalates into a touch that is inappropriate. The relationship is usually broken off only when it is discovered accidentally or when a child tells an adult who believes them.

Unfortunately, parents or other adults often think the child is lying, particularly if the abuser is someone familiar to the family or a member of the family. It is a rare exception for a child to make up stories about having been sexually abused. Due to lack of understanding, many parents may blame and shame the victim, especially if the abuse has gone on for some time.

It is not the child's fault! As a caring adult and the protector or your child and others who might have been affected and most certainly will, if the offender is not stopped, you must tell the proper authorities. It is important to your child that they see that you will believe them and act on their word. It is also important to the community that the sexual abuse, no matter how seemingly innocent the offender may try to make it out, is documented. Pick up the phone now and call the police; they will give you and your child guidance and support.

© Judy H. Wright, Parent Educator, www.artichokePress.com

This article has been written by Judy H. Wright, a parent educator and PBS consultant. You will find a full listing of books, tele-classes, and workshops listed at www.ArtichokePress.com. You have permission to use the article providing full credit is given to author. She may be contacted at 406-549-9813 or JudyWright@ArtichokePress.com


MORE RESOURCES:

ABC News

Autumn Babies More Prone to Asthma
U.S. News & World Report, DC - 15 hours ago
21 (HealthDay News) -- The season of a baby's birth may help predict that child's risk of asthma, new research suggests. Babies born in autumn -- about four ...
Fall Babies May Have Higher Asthma Risk ABC News
Autumn babies at greater risk of asthma: study Reuters
Autumn Babies Are More Prone To Childhood Asthma eFluxMedia
WebMD - MedPage Today
all 131 news articles


guardian.co.uk

Study: Forward-Facing Strollers May Harm Babies Emotionally
FOXNews - 15 hours ago
Pushing babies in forward-facing strollers may harm them emotionally due to the lack of face-to-face contact with the parent pushing them, a British study ...
Are modern buggies bad for babies? guardian.co.uk
Study: Away-facing strollers stress babies CNN
Babies' strollers could affect development ABC7Chicago.com
AFP - Mom Logic
all 71 news articles


Los Angeles Times

A safe haven for whom?
Baltimore Sun, United States - 30 minutes ago
The 2002 law was an attempt to prevent the dumping of newborn babies in trash bins. It's an imperfect law; children are still being left in dumpsters - and ...
Troubled US children abandoned in state haven The Age
all 14 news articles


Zee News

Miley Cyrus doesn`t want babies named after her
Zee News, India - 4 hours ago
London, Nov 21: Teen actress Miley Cyrus is appealing to new mothers not to name their babies after her. According to thesun.co.uk, the “Hannah Montana” ...


Babies Stressing Strollers Study
kypost.com, KY - 9 hours ago
The study actually calls for the redesign of baby strollers. Beverly Smolansky, a child psychologist at Cincinnati Children's Hospital, says not so fast. ...


eFluxMedia

Early HIV Treatment Best for Babies
U.S. News & World Report, DC - Nov 19, 2008
19 (HealthDay News) -- A new study finalizes research that changed guidelines around the world regarding when HIV-infected babies should begin drug therapy. ...
Rapid care 'cuts baby's HIV risk' BBC News
Treat HIV-positive babies from the start Science News
Early HIV Treatment Cuts Babies’ Death Risk eFluxMedia
Business Day - Reuters India
all 66 news articles


Baby shower connects mothers-to-be, agencies
Oxford Press, OH - 3 hours ago
Melissa attends parenting classes with Kristen, a pregnant 16-year-old sophomore at MHS, and they attended the Help Me Grow baby shower Thursday, Nov. ...


Hospital Welcomes ‘Miracle Babies’ Home
Queens Tribune, NY - Nov 20, 2008
By Nicole Alibayof The monitor was showing a flat line and the baby wasn’t breathing. Nineteen minutes later the doctor was still trying to resuscitate him ...
Infant child care is scarce in Central New York The Post-Standard - Syracuse.com
all 2 news articles


'Take care of my babies,' suspect pleads
Pittsburgh Tribune-Review, PA - Nov 20, 2008
"She said, 'Take care of my babies,' " said Darlene Wakmunski, who spoke by phone Thursday with her sister. "She felt bad for the agent and his family. ...


SmartAboutHealth

In vitro babies have more birth defects
Seattle Post Intelligencer - Nov 18, 2008
A new study released this week from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention found that babies conceived through in vitro fertilization are two to ...
Babies Conceived With Fertility Treatment Have More Birth Defects dBTechno
Birth Defects More Likely For Babies Conceived With ART SmartAboutHealth
Infertility Treatment Babies Have More Birth Defects eFluxMedia
National Business Review - Chicago Tribune
all 111 news articles

babies - Google News