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Lucy Siegle On Eithical Living: Sunday March 5, 2006 The Observer

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Some Tips for Healthy Parenting


Looking back through my files I've come across several great tips for Parents. Here are just a few that I hope will be helpful to you as you invest your day in raising our next generation.

1) Know the difference between big things and little things.

2) Know the difference between incompetence and rebelliousness. If you child does something out of incompetence, then take the time to teach your child how to do it right. If your child acts out of rebellion toward your authority as a parent, then this behavior needs to be disciplined or punished, but cannot be tolerated or accepted.

3) The word "discipline" means "to teach, to shape, to mold, or to perfect." Remember this.
 
4) Be firm, be consistent, and build a personal relationship with your child.

5) Be careful not to become overly performance oriented with your children. They are more than just homework, reports, and chores. There is a real person there who has hopes, dreams, fears, likes and dislikes. Get to personally know your child.

6) Quality time is no substitute for quantity time. The average father in America spends only 47 seconds a day in conversation with his children. But I am sure that it is quality time.

7) Be a positive person, and a positive role model for your child. The best predictor of how your child will be when he is 30-40 years old is how YOU are as a person today. Be a positive influence on your child socially, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.

8) Make the effort to catch your child doing something right every day.

9) Teach your child how to be successful. First, take the time to figure out in your own life what it means to be "successful." Is it just having more money or stuff? Or is there more to your life than that?

10) Teach your child self-control and respect for others.

Douglas Cowan, Psy.D., is a family therapist who has been working with ADHD children and their families since 1986. He is the clinical director of the ADHD Information Library's family of seven web sites, including http://www.newideas.net, helping over 350,000 parents and teachers learn more about ADHD each year. Dr. Cowan also serves on the Medical Advisory Board of VAXA International of Tampa, FL., is President of the Board of Directors for KAXL 88.3 FM in central California, and is President of NewIdeas.net Incorporated.


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