HOME

BOOKMARK

NEWSLETTER

Join our newsletter to receive news of offers and discounts

Search

AS FEATURED IN...


Lucy Siegle On Eithical Living: Sunday March 5, 2006 The Observer

Weight Watchers®.co.uk. Now with an online plan.

Navigation


Parening Books

Search Now:
Amazon Logo


Top Seven Tips To Become A Good Stepmother


Becoming a stepmother can undoubtedly be one of the most challenging, yet rewarding, experiences in a woman's life.

Every family's circumstances are certainly different in some ways. There are numerous uncontrollable factors, which will inevitably effect your relationship with your stepchildren, like: whether the children have a living biological mother; whether they have any contact with their biological mother; how long ago and why their biological parents are no longer together; etc...

Consider the following seven suggestions to help you be the best stepmom you can be...

1) Remember that they are not YOUR children. You do not automatically become equal to their father in any way - particularly when it comes to discipline, enforcing rules etc... Discuss your role in their lives with their father and then with them. Let him tell them how he expects them to interact with you. (For example: Your husband may say that his children must listen to you just the same as they listen to him... or He may decide that he is the still the primary care-giver, law-maker, rule-enforcer...) Make sure he is fair to you and them, so you do not become the instant "enemy."

2) Make time for your stepchildren. Show an interest in their daily lives - how they're doing in school, what they do after school, their hobbies at home, etc... Get involved with their social life, sporting events, extracurricular activities IF they want you to. Do not try too hard or push yourself into their life. And definitely do not pry into their business.

3) Do not break their trust in you. Develop an open line of communication by talking to them and respecting their wishes. If they ask you not to tell their father something they've shared with you, DO NOT betray their confidence by running to him. (Unless of course, it is something critical that he must know and then ask him not to tell the kids that you were the person who told him...)

4) Be yourself. Develop a totally unique relationship with your stepchildren - in a way that does not try imitate their mother. Do not try to be like her or to replace her.

5) Never talk badly about the children's mother in front of them. Try to establish some level of communication with her if she is still involved in their life. It can help the kids tremendously if you and their mother get along. And it can hurt them deeply if you don't.

6) Have patience. Do not expect miracles to occur overnight. This is not an "instant" happy family... But if you try to make the transition a pleasant one and create an positive living environment, time will do the rest.

7) Remember that you are the "outsider." They did not choose you. Their father did. Their standards are probably extremely rigid. You are the adult. They are children and you have to earn their love and respect.

Resource Box - © Danielle Hollister (2004) is the Publisher of BellaOnline Quotations Zine - A free newsletter for quote lovers featuring more than 10,000 quotations in dozens of categories like - love, friendship, children, inspiration, success, wisdom, family, life, and many more. Read it online at - http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art8364.asp


MORE RESOURCES:

MiamiHerald.com

Breastfed babies may gain less weight
Fox News
Babies who are fed milk from their mothers' breasts gain less weight over their first year compared to babies fed milk—breast or formula—from a bottle, suggests a new study. The lead author said the difference may come down to how much of a role ...
Did Cave Babies Have Attachment Parents?MiamiHerald.com
Bottle-fed babies gain more weight in first year, study findsVancouver Sun

all 53 news articles »


Top Baby Names In Nevada
KLAS-TV
More>> LAS VEGAS -- Officials say Sophia and Anthony were the top baby name picks among Nevada parents in 2011. The Social Security Administration says the 221 babies named Sophia puts Nevada in line with their peers nationwide.

and more »


TIME

For the first time, minority babies are the majority in U.S.
Chicago Sun-Times
By Hope Yen May 18, 2012 1:40AM Stephanie Dowell/Post-Tribune A baby opens her eyes as she and fellow newborns have their picture taken in the nursery of the family birthing center at St. Margaret Mercy Hospital in Dyer May 23, 2001.
White babies lose USmajorityThe Durango Herald
Minority babies outnumbered white newborns in 2011Washington Post
More minority babies than whites in US: Census BureauChicago Tribune
TIME
all 1,220 news articles »


LifeHealthPro

White babies are the new minority in America
Los Angeles Times
By David Horsey Pudgy, pink Gerber babies are no longer the typical child being born in the United States. According to the US Census Bureau, moms who are Latino, Asian, African American or mixed race are now giving birth to just over 50% of American ...
America's Non-White Majority Won't Remake the GOP Anytime SoonHuffington Post (blog)
More minority babies than whites in USAllentown Morning Call
The baby bombshellNew York Post (blog)
Arizona Daily Star -ABC NEWS 4 -BET
all 22 news articles »


The Star-Ledger - NJ.com

Strollin' with your baby in Hoboken
The Star-Ledger - NJ.com
By Kathleen O'Brien/The Star-Ledger Perhaps it was the pipe-cleaner bracelet that clinched a trophy in the Hoboken Baby Parade for this 2011 participant. Think of it as the Easter Parade for toddlers. Some parents dress their babies in the standard ...



NDTV

Two more babies die in Srinagar hospital; protesters block highway
NDTV
Srinagar: The horror of infant deaths continues in Srinagar with two more babies having lost their lives in the last 24 hours at the government-run GB Pant Hospital in the city. With this, the toll in the hospital has risen to 46 in less than three ...
Infant DeathsGreaterKashmir.com

all 115 news articles »


BBC News

Babies to 'teach' pupils empathy
BBC News
Babies are set to be brought into primary schools in Cardiff to help improve pupils' empathy levels and help reduce any bullying and aggression. The scheme, pioneered in Canada, encourages children to interact in a nurturing manner after observing a ...



Hundreds of thousands of baby red crabs invade Cayman Islands
Washington Post
SAN JUAN, Puerto Rico — Hundreds of thousands of red baby crabs are invading the Cayman Islands in a seasonal migration that residents say is unusually heavy this year. The crabs are blanketing roads, scurrying across yards and scratching their way up ...

and more »


PBS

Baby's Tumor Means Surgery Before Birth
PBS
"But we don't know why they occur in only some babies, or why some grow more than others," said Crombleholme, who is now surgeon-in-chief of the Colorado Institute for Maternal and Fetal Health. Once a fetus develops a tumor, it can grow very rapidly ...



Newborn babies being wrapped in towels because of hospital blanket shortage
Scottish Daily Record
NEWBORN babies are being wrapped in towels instead of blankets because of shortages at one of Scotland's biggest maternity hospitals. Last night, politicians united in anger over the scandal – just two months after Alex Salmond promised changes after a ...
Hospital short of blankets for babiesThe Scottish Sun

all 3 news articles »

Google News